"Two Things"

I tell myself things that get me through my day. Two things specifically... "nothing is perfect" and "an ex is an ex for a reason". 

i tell myself these things constantly in hopes of believing it. One is to try and believe that what we had wasn't perfect and two is to believe that we really arent meant to be together. 

I hate the awkward feelings and moments when we talk on the phone or when our eyes meet. I hate the guards we put up to try and protect ourselves from eachother. Are things that bad that its this hard to even try and be friends? 

i dont know what to say... i hate this, im just hurtin'

good night.